[For Married Couples] 6 Steps To Asking For What You Want In Bed!!

s*xual communication, which is necessary
to get what you want out of s*x, is a
challenge for most couples. Many people
are either too embarrassed or concerned
that talking about s*x and what you want
in bed will lead to an argument. Discussing
s*x with your spouse will not only increase
your intimacy, but it will also improve s*x.
And you can talk about the kind of s*x
you’d like to have without fighting. Really. Here’s what you
need to do to ask for what you want in bed when having s*x
–
1.
s*xual Communication – Think before you talk.
Before you broach the subject of s*x with your spouse, you
must be sure of your intentions. Your motivation should be to
improve your s*x life and enjoy s*x more and not to punish
your husband for forgetting to mow the lawn last weekend.
Once you are certain your intentions are good, come up with a
plan for what you’d like to say. Consider your spouse’s
feelings and think specifically about what you truly desire.
Make a list if you have to.
2. s*xual Communication – Set the mood.
Obviously, you should pick a time and place (your home is
probably best) where the two of you can be alone and free
from distractions. If you’re just interested in increasing the
frequency of s*x, you might consider setting the mood before
coming out and asking for s*x. For instance, you could light a
few candles, run a bath for you and your spouse, and then
start kissing him or her to get s*x started. In this way, you
are communicating without saying a word.
3. s*xual Communication – Be positive.
Instead of telling your partner the things he or she does during
s*x that you don’t like, tell them what they do to pleasure you.
For example, you could say, “You drive me wild when you
nibble on my ear before s*x,” instead of, “I hate it when you
lick my belly during s*x.” If you keep telling your spouse about
the stuff you like, eventually he or she will focus on a
repertoire of those things.
4. s*xual Communication – Give explicit directions.
Again, you’re trying to eliminate criticism and negativity to
avoid hurting your spouse’s feelings. Tell him or her exactly
what you’d like done to you. Be very specific. Whisper
something like, “Look into my eyes as you unbutton my shirt.
Kiss me and run your finger down my torso. Begin to touch my
br**sts…” You get the idea. This exercise will not only get you
what you want in bed but it can also be er*tic, which can
spice up s*x.
5. s*xual Communication – Use your hands.
Sometimes, you don’t even have to talk. You can simply use
your hands to direct your spouse along your body and into the
positions you’d like. This show and tell could even be a game
for the two of you, where neither of you talks, but you let
your hands – and perhaps some moaning if it happens
naturally – be your guide.
6. s*xual Communication – Employ positive reinforcement.
When your spouse does something you enjoy while having s*x,
tell him or her. Moan, groan, or simply say, “That was great…”
or “I love it when you do that…” Speak up because a pat on
the back, a round of applause, and a “You’re wonderful”
always set up a person for continued success. We all want to
get those applause again and again.